The Problem With Human Trafficking In Hong Kong

Traffic sucks. It’s never a good sign and it never ends well. Plus, everywhere in the world thinks they have it the worst. But I’ve got a bombshell for you. What makes it even more unbearable in Hong Kong than anywhere else in the world is that it’s not confined to just the roads. I’m talking about the Human Traffic situation.

If you thought a New York Second, a London Jibber or a Honkers Honker was bad enough then just try going anywhere by foot in Asia’s World City (HK). The minute you step out from behind your desk at work into the office space behind, you’ll find someone walking 0.2 miles per hour, chatting on their phone or strolling arm in arm with 15 other friends across the entire walkway. And then you hit the elevator.

Unfortunately, there’s no give way sign here. There’s just a crap load of people cramming themselves into a box where personal space just goes out the door you came in. And the invasion of breathing room does not end there.

You exit the elevator and you’re confronted by the escalator. Even though I’m sure everyone understands international escalator etiquette, there’s always someone standing still on the left hand side. And you just know they are fully aware of the queue of angry folks behind them.

If you EVER make it outside your building, before your lunch hour is up, then I’m sorry to say it won’t get any better. I can, however, offer you some advice. If you are an avid car spotter, this is where you’ll notice several specific models. So here’s a list of ones to avoid at all costs.

。        Firstly, there’s the old beat-up truck that’s giving off really bad fumes. Try and avoid getting stuck behind this one, they’ll never let you by.

。        Secondly, there are the wide-loaders. And I’m not talking about fat people. I’m talking about the groups of friends, helpers and tourists that walk 5 abreast down a 2 person pavement. More often than not they will see you coming, but there’s no chance they’ll ever give way. My advice, ram them head on and use both shoulders. To quote True Grit “The harder and faster you run at a man, it does not matter how many people he has with him, you’ll put the fear of God in him and he’ll scatter like the wind.”

。        Lastly, be on the look-out for the tourist couple. They aren’t slow or hard to navigate; they simply break down without warning. You’ll be strolling at pace behind them looking forward to your subway lunch only to find yourself face planted into their sweaty back. And apparently it’s your fault?

Collision Imminent. Always be sure to look out for the avid overtaker.

So you are probably wondering what type I am. Well, like most Westerners, I walk with determination, purpose and at speed. Therefore, I consider myself an F1 car in this environment. I see the gaps and hit the throttle, swerve through tight corners and out break the following pack. It’s the only way to survive, and trust me when I say this, you need the reflexes of a formula 1 driver to get anywhere on-time in this city.

Thus, at a guess, I’d say the reason for the congested, stressed-out and slow road situation is most likely because walking anywhere is such a hassle and a headache that driving is really the lesser of two evils. At least you can have air-con, a comfy seat and some music.

P.S. On the subject of driving, can the owner of the overcompensatingly large engine super car that speeds past my flat every night at 11.30pm, STOP. You’re not cool and I’m literally one day away from deploying a spike strip. Consider this a fair warning.

The closest I'll get to a porn star

Yes that's me. On the left of course. And no it's not because I fooled around with a ladyboy in Phuket. The article explains all.


Hot favorites for Sheen job

Thursday, March 31, 2011

A Hong Kong-based copywriter has made it into the second round of Tiger Blood Intern, troubled American actor Charlie Sheen's online search for his social media promoter.
The problem is he'll be up against other hardworking candidates.

Richard James Dunn made it into the top 250 from a pool of more than 74,000 applicants who are willing to undertake an eight-week paid internship to promote and develop Sheen's social media network.

The list will be further trimmed to 50, and there are some pretty big favorites to make the cut.

One of them is Isis Taylor - a 21-year-old adult film star.

And given the actor's well-known association with some of her colleagues, it won't be a surprise if Sheen already has his eyes set on someone who can work multiple shifts.


- I write, therefore I am.

Location:Gilman St,,Hong Kong

My Take On Social Media In 2 Mins

Using only an iPhone 4 and 1 hour of my day, I created this YouTube video as part of my submission for the #TigerBloodIntern interview

CLICK THE LINK BELOW TO VIEW THE VIDEO

Social Media in 2 mins using only an iPhone 4

ENJOY

3 thoughts on creativity from an aspiring Mad Man

Because so much changes in a year, I’ve compiled a few thoughts on my first at OgilvyOne.

1 – Don’t strain yourself for big ideas

Big ideas do exist. I’ve seen them. They litter the walls, halls and even the stalls of our office. And as a young writer, they’re shoved in your face from the moment you arrive. This is of course daunting. And without guidance it can often shock you into buying every copywriting book around. At least that’s how I dealt with it. But there is also another way.

Relax. It sounds simple, but even today I find it hard not to stress about a new brief. And to be honest, I doubt if I’ll ever not. Even the great man himself (David Ogilvy) once said “The first thought that runs through my mind whenever a new brief falls on my desk is that I’m not going to be able to do it”. That is why my first thought on creativity is so important. So repeat after me…

Read, rest and repeat.

Then get off your chair and do something that takes you away from your work. Play pool, go to lunch, watch TV. Your brain is digesting and it needs time to think. And worrying over a brief only reduces your ability to think. You can trust me on that as well.

2 – Be an early bird not a night owl

Yes, this line has been stolen from our recent internal campaign. But it’s rather playful and it gets my message across. I get to the office around 8.30-9 a.m. which is about 2 hours before most of the staff do, 4 hours before my Creative Director. This is far from a jab at my fellow colleagues - each to their own and without everyone else I would be lost. And I don’t do this to score points or get noticed. I do it because it’s quiet. I can think and be with my thoughts. It’s often why when it gets noisy I lock myself in a boardroom to brainstorm with a white-board.

I’ve also learnt from a master. Taking your lunch at 12 means you get quiet time in the office when you return at 1. These are the precious moments in my job where peace and serenity are warmly welcome. You are probably thinking that this contrasts my first creative thought, above, but both are valid points. You need quiet time and distractions in order to think. You just require them at set times during the creative process.

Quiet time is for after you have digested the brief. Distractions are for after you have a brief in. Simple.

3 - Get down with the lingo

Finally, a few buzz words and catch phrases to help you navigate the office

        A – Final Approval: Basically means order dinner to the office, you’re staying past midnight.

        B – I pulled it out of my arse: Every creative in the business uses this term. My reasoning is that it’s an excuse to share an idea you think is amazing, that you know no one else will like. It allows you to retract it if the general opinion is crap. After all, your arse is only ever full of s**t.

        C – OE: This is the outer envelope for a Direct Mail or DM. The most important platform in marketing. NEVER EVER LEAVE IT OFF A CONCEPT. Your Creative Director will throttle you. The same goes for a P.S. (see below)

        D – P.S. Apart from the headline of a letter, and of course the OE, this is the single most important thing you can add. Research has shown that over 80% of readers only look at this, the OE and your headline, so make it count. And I’m not going to reference where I got this statistic because 4/5 statistics are made up.

        E – Concept: This one’s pretty obvious. Every idea needs legs that carry it beyond the face of the product. Ergo, you’re not selling a watch your selling the concept of time.

        F – USP: Unique selling point. Something, anything, your product has that no one else has. Basic marketing. And one more thing while I’m at it, sell benefits as USPs not features.

        G – Always think of the opposite: Ah, this is one of my favorites. It means that if you have an idea or a concept, turn it on its head and it’ll probably work harder. There are a few great examples out there but my favorite is the following. American Express does not have a pin, annoyingly, they always make you sign. This is often seen as a down side because it’s slow. If you turn it on its head, however, it can be used as a USP. Write a line such as “I am not a number” and you’ve singled out American Express as prestigious and exclusive, exactly what the brand is.

H – A blank page: This can be the most daunting thing to any creative, however, draw several black boxes on it and fill them with shit ideas. Then draw more on another page and do the same. Keep doing this until you have three out of 100 ideas that could work. Then go back to your blank page and develop these three out of their boxes and into something great. (Our Worldwide Creative Director taught me that one. Thanks Khai Meng)

So there you have it. There’s a lot more to it than that of course. So hold your breath. More to come soon. For now, go and digest.

The year dot plus one

Yes, I'm officially back. Aged one (and 23). I feel it's about time I continued writing my blog. After all it's almost a year since life began for me and as you do at such a young age, I've forgotten almost everything I learnt and achieved. Hence, onward and upward.






And boy has the world changed in just one year. I've worked my way into my dream job, forced the girl of my dreams into a solid commitment and jumped on the "I'm writing a novel" bandwagon, not to mention I also learnt the difference between than and then.






So, I'll see you all very soon, back here in the usual place. Let's see what this year holds.

PS: Yes, I'm attempting to write a book. All judgement, laughter and banter accepted.


- I write, therefore I am.

iPhones, girlfriends and flip-flops are all banned on planes

Did you know that among the list of things you’re not allowed to take on planes there’s lithium batteries (found in almost every Apple item since the first ever iPod), aerosol cans (just like the ones they sell in duty free before you fly) and sharp objects. Before you start asking if that includes pens, toothpicks, hair clips or just about a thousand other items you've probably carried onto a plane, it doesn’t. Apparently only knives and scissors are dangerous when it comes to airplanes.

What’s even stranger is that on Delta Airlines you are not allowed pocket knives, now does that mean you can take any knife that won't fit in your pocket? That leaves a lot of knives on the list. Confusing, no? Well, the real confusing thing is that there are several lesser known items that have been left off that really need to be added. I’ve compiled a short list of a few I think we can all agree should never be allowed on a plane.

For example; babies, which are a three fold problem on planes. They smell, they make loud noises and as soon as they reach 3 they end up kicking your seat for the duration of your flight. How about non in-ear headphones? You’ve all experienced this I am sure. There's that one guy with his music blasting way to loud for his own good, let alone the guy sitting 10 rows back from him. I mean the only positive note, sorry for the pun, is that he is going to lose his hearing within 2 years. So at least you can rest easy knowing that Karma is going to kick his ass. And these items are just the beginning. We might as well just throw the following in, after all, I’m sure we can all agree they should be banned; Flip-flops, smelly foods, flasks, FARTING (I mean come on, we’re all in a confined shared space, whoever it is just stop) BO (you know who you are) and last but def not least KELLY PESCOD. Yes that’s right, I've incriminated my own girlfriend, but then she's probably as bad as taking SARS or Uranium rods onto a plane. Even mentioning the word plane can set this poor girl off.

She’s the real reason I’m not so eager to travel back to the UK. It's not the weather, tax or Chavs that litter the streets, it’s the anguish of spending over a day locked in a 2x4 box with the world’s worst flyer.

So be aware when you next fly of the dangers that lurk at over 30,000 feet. The worst is blond, 5ft 5 and most likely popping sleeping pills. 

Anything can be art, even a blog!

http://www.wordle.net/show/wrdl/2250468/HKBlogart